How to Build Closeness in Your Relationships

Wanting more time in the day is as close to a universally agreed upon idea as we get. More often than not, it’s because we want more time to do what we actually want to do versus the things we have to do. The latter seems to take up all of our time and energy (thanks, capitalism!) leaving us without the space to check in with the people who matter most to us. The struggle is real, and yet, it’s not cool to neglect your important relationships if you want to maintain them.

So here I present you with five relatively easy and stress free ways to “hack” your relationships and time in order to maintain the closeness that’s so crucial. None of these are a perfect solution, but hopefully they’ll provide some guidance and support. At least until someone figures out how to make those 27 hour days a possibility!

Set Reminders for Yourself

There is no shame in the reminder game. Add a reminder or alarm to text your BFF to ask about their latest presentation at work. Leave yourself a note to make sure you are calling the fam at least once a week (or however often feels right for you!). And please, please – add birthdays to your calendar.

Share with Them Personally

I mentioned this in passing on a recent Instagram Live, but posting about what’s going on in your life on social media is not the same as sharing with someone directly. Yes, even if they watch your Stories. An announcement to the masses doesn’t create the same level of connection and communication that telling someone individually does. Leave the social media announcements for the acquaintances, fringe friends, and distant family members. For those closest to you, tell THEM.

Send Things

Memes are great. Animal videos are really why the internet exists. Very few people will get mad at a special delivery of chocolate covered strawberries. If you can’t be there in person, send something that feels like a light lift to brighten someone’s day. It might seem minor, but over time, these things really do add up and make a difference.

Let Them Know When You’re Thinking of Them

“I thought about texting you when X happened, but then…”

I hear this all the time. If you think about someone close to you, tell them. Share what reminded you of a fun time together or that you thought they would appreciate. No one is a mind reader, so make sure you share.

Take the Time

If you haven’t spend one on one time with someone close to you in a while, prioritize it. I know, easier said than done, but sometimes you do need to make the effort to shift things around in your schedule to get a FaceTime or brunch date on the calendar. It’s really easy to get caught up in the “it’s just one dinner” mentality when it comes to pushing things off until later, but later can often be the kiss of death for relationships.

Need extra support maintaining your relationships and connecting with others? Reach out today to get started with therapy.

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